Page 399 of 406 FirstFirst ... 299349389396397398399400401402 ... LastLast
Results 7,961 to 7,980 of 8102

Thread: Nerazzurro Down Under

  1. #7961
    I4E's Avatar
    Join Date
    03 Jul 11
    Posts
    10,724
    Thanked
    12,514 times
    Fav. Player
    ₩$

    Macedonia

    6 Forum Supporter
    Quote Originally Posted by Universe View Post

    Decided to start looking for a new job despite having not been here that long. I've mentally left this place and the work already. Boys come to Sydney, let's pool our peasant resources together and let's found a mobile handjob service.
    Les dewit... We'll call it 'the handymen'... Our motto can be 'no (hand)job is too big or small '
    INTERISTA 4 EVER

    I dont think the formation model counts, its all about the principles and the attitude" - Stefano Pioli

  2. Thanks (2): Fitzy, Shaun

  3. #7962
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    How about "Handymen for a happy end" as the advertisement jingle?
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  4. Thanks (2): I4E, MVD

  5. #7963
    Shaun's Avatar
    Join Date
    04 Mar 04
    Posts
    13,803
    Thanked
    17,506 times
    Fav. Player
    Kovacic

    Macau

    57 Forum Supporter 10 years of FIF Best Overall Poster
    Endaway Handymen Inc.
    Quote Originally Posted by DM_ View Post
    Then we'll just buy the federation and create our own rules.
    Quote Originally Posted by Pimpin View Post
    I dont think juventus are willing to sell

  6. Thanks (2): Fitzy, I4E

  7. #7964
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    The best Fridays are when you don't have to work them.
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  8. Thanks (3): I4E, MVD, Shaun

  9. #7965
    firmino's Avatar
    Join Date
    23 Nov 15
    Posts
    4,496
    Thanked
    4,814 times
    Fav. Player
    Miranda

    Italy

    70
    "we'll give you a hand".
    My username has nothing to do with the player of loserpool fc, it is just a reference to an Italian novel.

  10. Thanks (3): Fitzy, I4E, MVD

  11. #7966
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    The bender continues
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  12. Thanks (2): I4E, MVD

  13. #7967
    Uncommon's Avatar
    Join Date
    23 Aug 11
    Posts
    3,258
    Thanked
    2,978 times
    Fav. Player
    Cham-paggin?

    Estonia

    92
    It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

  14. Thanks (1): MVD

  15. #7968
    Universe's Avatar
    Join Date
    27 Jan 09
    Posts
    16,363
    Thanked
    25,886 times
    Fav. Player
    Bossvaldo

    South Korea

    89 Forum Supporter Most Humorous Member
    Was introduced to some 18 year old girl at a friends bday lunch the other week. I felt and looked all of ten years older than her, that bitch. I got lazy and stopped for a while but I've gotten back into the habit of applying lotion to my face every night before bed. Need to restore some youthful glow to my pathetic skin which is starting to look a lot like that cunt from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade who chose poorly and drank from the wrong cup o' Christ.

    Speaking of young girls, I went out for a coffee at the Central mall near my office, or as it should be renamed, fat fuck central. It must be school holidays because there's tons of little shitters waddling about and they're all so chunky and wearing such revealing clothing. I don't want to get into any socio-racial debate but I suspect it's the 'black' pop culture influence permeating into mainstream white Australian culture. Back in the 90's and 2000's, you only ever heard black dudes from the US talking about ass and all that. Nowadays I see little white and Asian kids around, talking about other white and Asian girls their age, lamenting a lack of ass. It's as if they're both spastic enough to firstly find that ludicrous Kim kardashian-type body attractive, and secondly, expect girls their age to be like that. I saw a pasty little pimple-ridden shitstain say "nah bro, Emily's got a flat ass man, and her tits are low-key A F". Made me think the 25 years in Goulburn Max Security might not be that bad.

    Speaking of ass, I go to the gym in a very Australian suburb. And I only ever go late, I'm usually there from 11:30PM to 1:30AM. Aside from the small crack crew of nuts like myself who are there at that obscene hour, I very rarely see any women at the gym. But for whatever reason, the only women that I do see, are all westernised Asian girls. And I swear to god, all they do are ass exercises, like for an hour straight. Nothing else. Fuck. Get a fucking life.

    Also despite increasing their strength almost double, my traps won't grow anymore fucken. Howmi gonna brock lesnar now
    **I move away from the mic to breathe in

    \_(ツ)_/


  16. #7969
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    I can see you throwing those dumbbells around, all pissed off at the fact that you're getting sweat all through your new suit.
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  17. Thanks (4): I4E, MVD, Raul Duke, Universe

  18. #7970
    I4E's Avatar
    Join Date
    03 Jul 11
    Posts
    10,724
    Thanked
    12,514 times
    Fav. Player
    ₩$

    Macedonia

    6 Forum Supporter
    Wonderful Uni ! Grande !


    Your thoughts are as if they've been scooped out of my wise head then spread across the NDU thread like warm butter ! Moi bien !

    With every passing day, the rising of the sun, through to its setting over the shit stain that is our West (Perth), you remind me of my youthful and confident self. I tip my bowler hat to you good sir.
    INTERISTA 4 EVER

    I dont think the formation model counts, its all about the principles and the attitude" - Stefano Pioli

  19. Thanks (4): Fitzy, MVD, Raul Duke, Universe

  20. #7971
    Dylan's Avatar
    Join Date
    20 Jul 08
    Posts
    22,773
    Thanked
    20,294 times
    Fav. Player
    Walter Samuel

    Ireland

    13
    Quote Originally Posted by Universe View Post
    I don't want to get into any socio-racial debate but I suspect it's the 'black' pop culture influence permeating into mainstream white Australian culture. Back in the 90's and 2000's, you only ever heard black dudes from the US talking about ass and all that. Nowadays I see little white and Asian kids around, talking about other white and Asian girls their age, lamenting a lack of ass. It's as if they're both spastic enough to firstly find that ludicrous Kim kardashian-type body attractive
    Uni putting the words to my thoughts. I may add at liberty, women inflating their lips to unnatural size that just look like a reaction to a bee-sting. Fuck me above, cut the shit.

  21. Thanks (5): Fitzy, I4E, MVD, Raul Duke, Universe

  22. #7972
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    Just sitting here watching the Knights penalise themselves to another loss. Thank fuck for beer.
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  23. Thanks (2): I4E, MVD

  24. #7973
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    Who is on the 2-up today? I'll be on the 3-up since I'm gettin right up it.
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  25. Thanks (2): I4E, MVD

  26. #7974
    Universe's Avatar
    Join Date
    27 Jan 09
    Posts
    16,363
    Thanked
    25,886 times
    Fav. Player
    Bossvaldo

    South Korea

    89 Forum Supporter Most Humorous Member
    As usual, shut it, Fitz. The fact that my new phone won't auto scroll and follow the text as I type is 99% of the reason I'm not as active on the forum recently. It's not as if I suddenly went and got a life, or real friends. Seriously though having to re-center my screen onto what I'm typing every sentence is infuriating.

    Speaking of friends and infuriating, my friend is ridiculously lucky when it comes to gambling. If I needed to flip a coin 50 times and guess correctly, (and there was money on it) I would somehow defy all chance, logic, existential and metaphysical force, and end up with a 4/50 success rate. My cunt mate on the other hand would probably guess right about 40+ times. I've played poker with the dude at the casino several times too. Each time I distinctly remember repeatedly being given hands like 2 and 5's while the cunt kept getting pocket aces etc. Cunt.

    Speaking of cunts, I saw we somehow lost to Fiorentina on the weekend. I failed to watch the match, probably because I accidentally set my alarm for 4:45PM instead of 4:45AM. What a bunch of shitters. We should replace our entire back 5 with Medel the first to get the fuck out.

    Also, despite wearing Green Irish Tweed by Creed, a $380 fragrance (and taking every chance to remind my friends of it, saying "mate, that's Green Irish Tweed by Creed") I just spent another $400 on two colognes from Etat Libre d'Orange, a boutique store in Paris. I don't know why I did it. I suspect I'm going through a third-life crisis where I'm too young to give up entirely, yet too old to not put in some serious effort. I envy the rich and famous, like I4E, and the soon-to-be-dead, like Shaun and Fitzy. I need to make more money so I can fill my vapid life and empty home with frivolous and meaningless luxury items, cutting all friendships and losing touch with reality in the process. Only then will I be truly happy.
    **I move away from the mic to breathe in

    \_(ツ)_/


  27. #7975
    Raul Duke's Avatar
    Join Date
    19 Dec 08
    Posts
    4,819
    Thanked
    5,241 times
    Fav. Player
    Milito

    Australia

    60 Forum Supporter
    You had me at "shut it, Fitz"

  28. Thanks (3): Fitzy, I4E, Universe

  29. #7976
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    Recently, while I'm on the piss, I've taken to making every sentence I string together a pun or bad Dad joke or similar. It's getting out of hand. I'm having people I've just met tell me to "shut the fuck up, mate". I must be getting old.
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.


  30. #7977
    Candreva Crosses's Avatar
    Join Date
    05 Feb 16
    Posts
    2,079
    Thanked
    976 times
    Fav. Player
    Italian Beckham
    Old name
    EEeyOO

    Europe

    87
    Quote Originally Posted by Fitzy View Post
    Recently, while I'm on the piss, I've taken to making every sentence I string together a pun or bad Dad joke or similar. It's getting out of hand. I'm having people I've just met tell me to "shut the fuck up, mate". I must be getting old.
    Daaamn they called you a mate instead of cunt? That must be so fkn bad in australia
    Quote Originally Posted by Candreva Crosses View Post
    But seriously, things can only go upwards for him now even more with a coach that fucking made Salah look good. Lets hope my name can be looked at as something positive for the season 17/18.

  31. #7978
    Fitzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    21 Aug 09
    Posts
    9,822
    Thanked
    15,176 times
    Fav. Player
    Zanetti

    Australia

    Forum Supporter
    Quote Originally Posted by Candreva Crosses View Post
    Daaamn they called you a mate instead of cunt? That must be so fkn bad in australia
    Was obviously because I didn't know them well enough at the time.
    Awaiting the start of our youth project.

  32. Thanks (1): I4E

  33. #7979
    Universe's Avatar
    Join Date
    27 Jan 09
    Posts
    16,363
    Thanked
    25,886 times
    Fav. Player
    Bossvaldo

    South Korea

    89 Forum Supporter Most Humorous Member
    OK. For the second morning in a row I've woken up with an unexplained cut on my body. Yesterday I woke up to find a cut on the knuckle of my right hand thumb and this morning I looked in the mirror to notice a small but noticable graze on the side of my nose. I don't know which one of you fucks is responsible for this but I'm going to find out.
    **I move away from the mic to breathe in

    \_(ツ)_/

  34. Thanks (3): Fitzy, I4E, Raul Duke

  35. #7980
    I4E's Avatar
    Join Date
    03 Jul 11
    Posts
    10,724
    Thanked
    12,514 times
    Fav. Player
    ₩$

    Macedonia

    6 Forum Supporter
    Quote Originally Posted by Fitzy View Post
    Recently, while I'm on the piss, I've taken to making every sentence I string together a pun or bad Dad joke or similar. It's getting out of hand. I'm having people I've just met tell me to "shut the fuck up, mate". I must be getting old.
    Yes, you're getting old. But with the ageing process, you're beginning to hate people more and more.
    INTERISTA 4 EVER

    I dont think the formation model counts, its all about the principles and the attitude" - Stefano Pioli


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •