Interview with Lionheart

[Cal]

You are contractually obligated to accept

1. What is your name?

2. When were you born?

3. What do you currently do (job/profession etc)?

4. When did you start supporting Inter and why?

5.What is your fondest memory of Inter?

6. Who is your favorite current player?

7. Who is you favorite player of all time except for Figo?

8. How did your love for Luis begin?

9. If you could only perform one sexual act on Figo, what would it be and why?

10. Explain the significance of fap.

11. Why do you dislike ze Germans so much despite living there?

12. Kimmy or Avora?

13. Hottest female you've ever seen in person (pics or it didnt happen rule applies)

14. Tits or Ass

15. Comment in one sentence on the following FIFAUW members:

Ahmed:
Andy:
Black:
Burak:
Cal:
Chaz:
Dara:
Dino:
Dylan:
Jerry:
Sok:
Willy:


Provide captions to the following pics:

 

[Sir0w]

1. Hen or Horse? And why?
2. If you had a cat, what would be his/her name?
3. If you could pick 3 people from FIF to live with in the same house, who would those 3 be and why? Details please..
4. Is another tatoo planned for the future? If so, what?
5. What is momentum for you?
6. Tissue or sock?
7. Your fap tactic?
8. No more gym or no more fap?
9. If you could ask Kimmy one question, what would that question be?

 

[Pajo]

This is going to be gold

 

[Sokrates]

So Dara... Let's start with the questions... :datass:

1) Your favourite food?
2) Your favourite music/ music style?
3) You're finding yourself on a lonely island, and a genie in a bottle offers you to realize your first 3 wishes. What would those be?
4) What do you like the most of those? Order it!
Simpsons, Top Gear, Two And A Half Men, The Big Bang Theory, CSI
5) Are you religious? If yes, which one...?
6) Did you ever curse about PSG because they bought some of our transfer targets (Lavezzi, Lucas...)
7) What do you like about Chelsea? And why don't you like City?
8) Which Inter coach did you like more? Hector Cuper or Gigi Simoni?
9) Which football "philosophy" do you like the most of those? Give everyone a number from 1 to 10 (1 = awful, 10 is fantastic)
Spain, Italy, England, Brazil, Argentina, Germany, Holland
10) If you had the chance to change something in this forum, what would it be?

 

[Coasterfreek]

When did your love and obsession for Figo begin? Was it from his days at Sporting CP or a specific match from him you remember that made you love him?

What are some pros and cons of residing in Germany?

 

[Raul Duke]

I got a question. Where the fuck have you been hiding?

 

[Fitzy]

When did your love and obsession for Figo begin? Was it from his days at Sporting CP or a specific match from him you remember that made you love him?

What are some pros and cons of residing in Germany?

Coaster, you're a freak.

 

[Lionheart]

INTERVIEW??? What Interview??? I ain't giving no interviews god damn, Also no autographs & pictures! GET AWAY FROM ME YOU PAPARAZZIS!!! What's there to interview tbh? Y'all know all my shit & how I roll.

...

...

...FIF goes in deep silence...

...& then:

...

...

Aight FINE god damn it...

1. What is your name?

Dara, also known across the league as "Darius Fapius Creepius". It's my Roman name. :work:

2. When were you born?

28.12.1984

3. What do you currently do (job/profession etc)?

I've had many different jobs until now. Jobs that had nothing to do with each other. Here are a few:

- Bartender
- Pianist at a piano bar
- Graphic designer
- Attorney assistant at a law firm

Now I work at the headquarters of the biggest bank in Germany, like a 8055. I'm planning to stay here longterm. They pay good money tbh.

4. When did you start supporting Inter and why?

I was a Real fan when I was a little fucker. I wasn't really a hardcore Inter supporter back in the day but I always kept an eye on them & had a good opinion about them. If y'all remember, they use to upload the goals after every match on inter.it & I watched every one of'em after each match day, but couldn't name the full squad or anything. I then actively started gloryhunting Inter after the treble but then I got trolled big time cuz I didn't see any glory after that & I've been stuck here ever since. okerface: All I got was a bunch of 2-5 Schalke & 0-1 Trabzan & some other crazy shit which I didn't sign up for. Also check this related answer tbh:

http://forzainterforums.com/showthr...oble-quot-Figo&p=691457&viewfull=1#post691457

I noticed the YouTube link doesn't work anymore. In my post, I was referring to his long range goal against England.

By the way, who the fuck is that Irish_Interista, whom I've quoted? :troll:

5. What is your fondest memory of Inter?

I'm not gonna be boring & say the treble. The 2-3 win against Bayern in the Champions League gave me by far the most multiple orgasms ever. That's right, my fondest memory of Inter is connected to Pandev himself okerface:

6. Who is your favorite current player?

Hmmm, not sure I have one tbh. Nobody is giving me that "Wow!" feeling. I think Ronaldo is cool, but I don't like him like that. I mean, he's a nice guy & everything but I only like him as a friend you know... I don't have that kind of a feelings for him.

7. Who is your favorite player of all time except for Figo?

Hmmm, also difficult. To me, nobody comes miles close to Figo. But I liked Roberto Carlos very much.
Eto'o tbh He was a saint, an angel Branca sold him for 20 mill.

8. How did your love for Luis begin?

See answer to question number 4 tbh

9. If you could only perform one sexual act on Figo, what would it be and why?

Uhhhmmm... Let me think... Uhhh... Prostate massage? okerface: Oh man... what did I just say... That's so disgusting, it's not even funny anymore. How did that even came to my mind, god damn... Let's move on to the next question! Shit... Fuck...

10. Explain the significance of fap.

Something near & dear to us all. Even to those who deny it. I fap & I'm sure y'all who are reading this right now, do fap too. & guess what? Your fathers fap too! & their fathers fapped too! I'm a preacher of having sex with ourselves, basically cuz I got no one else who is willing to fuck me (despite my brilliant looks, buff body, personality, etc.) :foreveralone: At least none that I know of. But if girlfriend or wife, then less fap tbh & more fuck.

11. Why do you dislike ze Germans so much despite living there?

Germany isn't a bad place at all to live. Everything organized as fuck, nice & tidy. I just wish the people were more friendly & cooler, trolling around, having fun & shit. That's unfortunately not the case. They're very cold & distanced. You can't meet new people here as easy as in America or southern Europe. & BAD LOSERS! Beat'em at anything & you'll be cursed at for ever. Fuck Bayern.

12. Kimmy or Avora?

Ooooh! That's a tough one. OK, let's see... Kimmy definitely has something & is horny as fuck but Avrora is the shit in my opinion! She was the complete package. Did you see how wet she was, god dayum! & that string hanging outta her ass! If I find a horny chick like her, I'd take her to the court house & marry the bitch as we speak, put a ring on it & everything.

*Note: To y'all confused fucks, about this question & my more confusing answer, this is just some insider shit between Jerry, Cal, Dino & me. We chat with one another on our iPhones on a daily basis & there is this girl-web-cam site, where chicks play with themselves live & you can watch'em & talk to them for free (no scam). If any of us discover some good shit we notify each other to watch & then we comment on that shit, live, like a Inter game.

13. Hottest female you've ever seen in person (pics or it didn't happen rule applies.)

I don't know about the hottest female, but I met a porn star once in the airport in Paris in 2005. Google "Aylar Lie". I was walking around & then I see her sitting by herself & then in my mind I go like "WAIT A MINUTE! I know you!!! I've dedicated uncountable faps to dat ass of yours, girl!". She suddenly notices me looking at her with my eyes almost popping outta my head & by the way she looked at me I know that she noticed that I know who she was. I think she was embarrassed tbh. Then, of course I didn't have the balls to walk up to her & talk... so that's that. I mean what do you gonna say? "Hey, how are you? my name is Dara & you wouldn't believe the amount of cum I've squeezed out of myself watching your vidoes."???

14. Tits or Ass

Ass all the way through. Can't get enough of it. God's finest creation to date :work:

15. Comment in one sentence on the following FIFAUW members:

Ahmed: 8055 Vieri 2011. Family owns shares in PSG.
Andy: Julione with a touch of Chaz? Needs to find his fix position in the team.
Black: I miss him tbh. AUW used to be gold when the full crew was around.
Burak: Constant good performances, great guy in person. I wish y'all could meet him.
Cal: AUW!!! Forza Celtic! Joined AUW, lagged the fuck outta the game. worked himself up to one of the best players.
Chaz: Truly missed tbh. FIFAUW isn't the same without him :troll:
Dara: Come on, eh! I can't comment on myelf. What's there to say other than brilliant, 8055, top, GOAT?
Dino: DinAUW da GAUWD. GOAT /thread. Should participate more in iPhone chat.
Dylan: Needs an iPhone & a copy of FIFA 13 to get back to life. Celtic > Irish NT
Jerry: My bro. I like to have homo sex with him one day.
Sok: 8055 reliable DM like a Mudingayi. Should roll more often.
Willy: 8055 ST. I have a brilliant business idea for him: Importing 8055 routers from Europe to Columbia & sell'em to folks.

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I tried the caption for the pics thing, but it didn't really work. They weren't even funny. Many of y'all are much better in that shit from what I've seen. I didn't even know what to write tbh. Not my strong suit.

----------

More answers coming soon.

 

[Sokrates]

Sok: 8055 reliable DM like a Mudingayi. Should roll more often.

Thanks it's a long time I didn't roll... okerface:

 

[Lionheart]

Jerry's Questions:​

1. Hen or Horse? And why?

Both looked fucked up tbh. Knew about the horse but the hen was new to me & fucked up in a whole new level. I even didn't know it fits in there. Couldn't believe my eyes okerface: I think I stick to human pussy tbh... excuse me, I meant my right hand.

2. If you had a cat, what would be his/her name?

I have(had) one tbh My precious Leo. Got him together with my ex, we broke up. I wanted her to have him cuz he's more attached to her. I miss him very much, the pain is killing me.

3. If you could pick 3 people from FIF to live with in the same house, who would those 3 be and why? Details please..

Good one. Honestly that would be the most epic shit ever, but can't choose only 3 of all y'all. The best scenario would be us having a full building to ourselves, with every 2-3 guys sharing 1 flat together. The doors would never be locked & we could all come & go as we please, watch Inter games together, share the pussy we might catch. But then again, I'd be in one flat with you & Cal tbh for obvious homosexual reasons.

4. Is another tattoo planned for the future? If so, what?

Not sure tbh. The one I got has a deep meaning & I wouldn't get another one unless it has a similar deep meaning as well. But I don't have anything else at the moment tbh, but I'm generally open to the idea of getting another one in the distant future.

5. What is momentum for you?

It's nothing & everything. It's that thin line between reality & illusion. It's the force behind every move & every decision. If the momentum goes, then we're fucked & we better turn them PS3s off, before losing & rage quitting. So listen to the voice of your momentum deep inside you. It's the voice of reason. :work:

6. Tissue or sock?

Tissue tbh. Didn't know people use socks. I couldn't do that shit unless I owned a sock company :ifyouknowwhatimean:

7. Your fap tactic?

Classic, old school shit, minus the spit + lube + dinotube okerface:

8. No more gym or no more fap?

I'm trying to find a common ground on which both can co-exist with one another in peace & harmony.

9. If you could ask Kimmy one question, what would that question be?

Can I lick your cunt?

Sok's Questions:​

So Dara... Let's start with the questions... :datass:

1) Your favourite food?

Rigatoni

2) Your favourite music/ music style?

Jazz/Blues, Funk, Rock'n'Roll

3) You're finding yourself on a lonely island, and a genie in a bottle offers you to realize your first 3 wishes. What would those be?

Honestly...

1. One, smoking, hot chick., with tits & ass & personality everything to be my wife
2. Unlimited foodz
3. Good weather forever on the island

I would then live on that island with that girl, happily ever after.

4) What do you like the most of those? Order it!
Simpsons, Top Gear, Two And A Half Men, The Big Bang Theory, CSI

Simpsons, Top Gear. Haven't watched the rest okerface:

5) Are you religious? If yes, which one...?

No religion. As a matter of fact I'm anti-religion. I believe in every man's power of brain & reason.

6) Did you ever curse about PSG because they bought some of our transfer targets (Lavezzi, Lucas...)

I did, but fuck'em tbh. I'm happy with the squad we're having right now

7) What do you like about Chelsea? And why don't you like City?

Chelsea's blueness tbh okerface: You might say City is also blue & you'd be right, but they're not as blue & fuck Arab money, messing the balance.

8) Which Inter coach did you like more? Hector Cuper or Gigi Simoni?

okerface: Uhhh... Gigi who? Hector who? okerface: Who are these dudes?

9) Which football "philosophy" do you like the most of those? Give everyone a number from 1 to 10 (1 = awful, 10 is fantastic)
Spain, Italy, England, Brazil, Argentina, Germany, Holland

- Italy: 10 I like Catenaccio
- Brazil/Argentina: 9
- Holland: 8
- England: 5
- Germany: 5
- Spain: You want me to give Spain a rating? Aight, here's my rating for Spain... FUCK'EM!

10) If you had the chance to change something in this forum, what would it be?

Less fights & argues. More & more trolling & laughs & jokes & AUW

Coasters Questions:​

When did your love and obsession for Figo begin? Was it from his days at Sporting CP or a specific match from him you remember that made you love him?

What are some pros and cons of residing in Germany?

Check answers that I gave Cal. It has been asnwered there.

Raul's Questions:​

I got a question. Where the fuck have you been hiding?

Too much on my plate recently man. I try to hit FIF more often though I miss the old days.

 

[Sir0w]

Have you ever had an imaginary friend?

Do frogs have ears?

If you were a worm, how long would you be?

Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

What is the most distant place you've visited (from your home)?

In scale from 1-5, how afraid of dark are you?

How often do you brush your teeth?

The person you would never want to meet?

Who is the person you trust most?

Have you ever collected stickers that are on fruits?

How weird is this?

How old is the oldest cell in your body?

Do you like carrots?

The size of your hard-disc?

What's your favourite word?

If you were a tree, what tree would you be?

When you looked in the mirror first thing this morning, what was the first thing you thought?

How much cash do you have on you?

What's a word that rhymes with TEST?

Who is the fourth person on your missed calls?

What is your favourite ring on your phone?

What shirt are you wearing?

What do you label youself as?

Name the brand of shoes you've recently worn.

Bright room or dark room?

What were you doing at midnight last night?

What did the last text message on your phone say?

Favourite age you've been so far?

What is your current desktop picture?

What was the last thing you said to someone?

If you had to choose between a millions bucks and being able to fly, which would you choose?

Do you like someone?

The last song you listened to?

You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist off the earth?

Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

What is your favorite cheese?

What is your guilty pleasure Disney movie?

What’s the longest you’ve gone without taking a bath?

If anyone in the room could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

Have you ever worn lingerie.

If you could be born into history as any famous person who would it be and why?

Do you have a secret talent and what is it?

You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Same rules as above. Who is it?

You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?

Why is abbreviated such a long word?

Why is a boxing ring square?

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

:work: :derp:

 

[sanka]

You got to be kiddin' me.. okerface:

 

[Cal]

Thank the lord my interview is over ...

 

[Sir0w]

Damn, I forgot a few... my bad

Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.

Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, What can you touch?

Before you started this survey, what were you doing?

What is the last thing you watched on TV?

Without looking, guess what time it is

Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?

With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Did you dream last night?

Do you remember your dreams?

When did you last laugh?

Do you remember why / at what?

What is on the walls of the room you are in?

Seen anything weird lately?

What do you think of this quiz?

What is the last film you saw?

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?

If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?

Tell me something about you that most people don't know.

If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

Do you like to dance?

Would you ever consider living abroad?

Does your name make any interesting anagrams?

Who made the last incoming call on your phone?

What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?

Last time you swam in a pool?

Type of music you like most?

Type of music you dislike most?

Are you listening to music right now?

What color is your bedroom carpet?

If you could change something about your home, without worry about expense or mess, what would you do?

What was the last thing you bought?

Have you ever ridden on a motorbike?

Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?

Do you have a garden?

Do you really know all the words to your national anthem?

What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?

If you could eat lunch with one famous person, who would it be?

Who sent the last text message you received?

Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?

What time is bed time?

Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?

How many tattoos do you have?

If you don't have any, have you ever thought of getting one?

What did you do for your last birthday?

Do you carry a donor card?

Who was the last person you ate dinner with?

Is the glass half empty or half full?

What's the farthest-away place you've been?

When's the last time you ate a homegrown tomato?

Have you ever won a trophy?

Are you a good cook?

Do you know how to pump your own gas?

If you could meet any one person (from history or currently alive), who would it be?

Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school?

Do you touch-type?

What's under your bed?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Think fast, what do you like right now?

Where were you on Valentine's day?

What time do you get up?

What was the name of your first pet?

Who is the second to last person to call you?

Is there anything going on this weekend?

How are you feeling right now?

What do you think about the most?

What time do you get up in the morning?

If you had A Big Win in the Lottery, how long would you wait to tell people?

Who would you tell first?

What is the last movie that you saw at the cinema?

Do you sing in the shower?

Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?

What do you do most when you are bored?

Do you love your job?

What did you want to be when you grew up?

If you could have any job, what would you want to do/be?

Which came first the chicken or the egg?

How many keys on your key ring?

Where would you retire to?

What kind of car do you drive?

What are your best physical features?

What are your best characteristics?

If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go?

What kind of books do you like to read?

Where would you want to retire to?

What is your favorite time of the day?

Where did you grow up?

How far away from your birthplace do you live now?

What are you reading now?

Are you a morning person or a night owl?

Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Can you close your eyes and raise your eyebrows?

Do you have pets?

How many rings before you answer the phone?

What is your best childhood memory?

What are some of the different jobs that you have had in your life?

Any new and exciting things that you would like to share?

What is most important in life?

What Inspires You?

:excitedeyes:

 

[Native]

DARA!!!

How have you fathered me?

 

[Dylan]

http://www.cfcl.com/vlb/Memes/Questionaires/random_1.html

 

[Sir0w]

http://www.cfcl.com/vlb/Memes/Questionaires/random_1.html

Irish hater

 

[Dylan]

Dutch Fapper.

 

[KevinB]

Aren't we all fappers? :troll:

 

[Coasterfreek]

What made you become a vegetarian?