The bullshit thread

phonk

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I like comparing anuses (or ani for the educated posters here) belonging to attractive women to chicken wings- it’s the crust which you want to relish. I’m a connoisseur so washing the cocoa butter off in the shower is considered a criminal offense from my point of view.

Spent another morning uselesspieceofshitting. Woke up unusually early after a heavy night of drinking, wanted to get shit done so I drove to the tobacconist to purchase some Benson & Hejizz to save money. Planned to stop smoking but gave up after 1,5 days so I have to adapt now. Went back to bed and swiped through bitches and the most horrendous profiles one could possibly create on Tinder. A picture which has burnt itself into my retina is a girls pink dyed armpit hair, no face just the armpit. Hilarious stuff.

Will force myself out of bed to shove some rice and chicken into my mouth because I need to work out today.
 

firmino

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random english lesson: how to ask for a coke.

 

firmino

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i'll put here my reply to "g" (whatever he is called on here), because it's a pain in the ass writing long posts on a smartphone.

modric, apparently, had this sort of non-written agreement with florentino perez that he could leave that summer. and it's likely that it is true, no one ever contradicted it. but perez could have simply went back on his word, maybe using as excuse that we (inter) wanted him for free, or next to nothing, or too low a fee, and that it would not have been fair.

that was the summer real madrid lost ronaldo, perez probably didn't want to lose another star.

that has nothing to do with a possible gentlemen's agreement (and not a "loan"...) between modric and suning that he would play 2/3 years at Inter, and later in suning's chinese club. once modric was at Inter, nothing would have prevented this from happening, except either party changing idea.

besides, even if all the part about playing in china wasn't true, this still has absolutely nothing to do with what was discussed earlier, that he just used Inter to get a better contract at madrid: again, it's possible, but not necessarily true. and in my opinion, he did want to join Inter: the main reason why i believe this is that there was a lot of time between the summer "mercato" rumours and the extension of his contract. had all of this just been a move to get a better contract from madrid, i believe they would have got to that much earlier, rather than several months after that.

last but not least, on a non-related note: i kind of find it hilarious trying so hard to prove that a player could not have possibly really wanted to join Inter.
 

brehme1989

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i'll put here my reply to "g" (whatever he is called on here), because it's a pain in the ass writing long posts on a smartphone.

you can use whatsapp on your pc
 

crzdcolombian

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Had to fire someone today for sending out the most epic of fk you emails to someone above him

The person responded by sending the email to the VP of my company and nothing I could do. I was then sent the email. Couldn’t stop laughing for like 5 minutes and everyone laughed but the person who the email was directed towards.

Sucks too because the guy who defiantly the best member of the team
I inherited. I said it was probably a joke he meant to send to someone else but hit respond instead of forward

Had to fire someone in a previous role because they sent a instant message talking shit about someone to that person instead of who they meant to say the joke to

When I meet people I say if you have something to send and aren’t sure. Use your cell phone. Text me a joke by text to our personal cell phones not to my email
 

Doffy

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ern7x82wge941.jpg


:awyeah:
 

phonk

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Doing some cocaine and watching horror flicks at night to chill out a little. Can it get any more relaxing? The answer's no.
 

crzdcolombian

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One of my friends bosses got fired because he smashed a intern haha

Told my friend to ask for the promotion now

The chick was super hot and def had a dad ferish because the dude was at least 40
And she is 22. Good for him tho just dumb to get caught at work haha

It’s like just go home and smash like a normal person!
 

Candreva Crosses

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crzdcolombian you got so many stories. America must be a fucked up place to live at
 

ChillBro

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Who do you think killed JFK?

Al Pacino (Jimmy Hoffa)

haha but seriously it was probably the mob - this RFK was pretty convinced the mob killed his brother and was sad because he thought they would go after him instead. Bobby (full disclosure - my political hero) went after the mob hard when he was attorney general and they felt pretty betrayed because they helped JFK get elected senator and president.
 

phonk

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As with everything in life there’s an unpleasant flip side of the coin, unfortunately that saying also applies to the life of a university student. When things don’t revolve about sluts, going out with friends, smoking the devils lettuce and talking about primates dicks people struggle with constant stress, existential threat… basically seeing your life falling apart in front of your eyes.

Now it’s my turn to be stuck in an uncomfortable situation, again. Got 6,5 weeks of constant paranoia ahead of me, then the day of judgement will arrive. Getting ready to pull all-nighters, injecting Red Bull straight into my veiny penis. 2 possible outcomes: I mess this up and get axed from my studies or the more enjoyable option, getting it done properly. After getting it done properly (hopefully!) I’ll get some smaller subjects out the way next semester and pass on the bigger exams, otherwise I might go bananas. Neither is it in any pretty girls interest if I have to move to another city to continue studying, I think about other people too.

And now I gotta massage my humongous ballsack.
 

ChillBro

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As with everything in life there’s an unpleasant flip side of the coin, unfortunately that saying also applies to the life of a university student. When things don’t revolve about sluts, going out with friends, smoking the devils lettuce and talking about primates dicks people struggle with constant stress, existential threat… basically seeing your life falling apart in front of your eyes.

Now it’s my turn to be stuck in an uncomfortable situation, again. Got 6,5 weeks of constant paranoia ahead of me, then the day of judgement will arrive. Getting ready to pull all-nighters, injecting Red Bull straight into my veiny penis. 2 possible outcomes: I mess this up and get axed from my studies or the more enjoyable option, getting it done properly. After getting it done properly (hopefully!) I’ll get some smaller subjects out the way next semester and pass on the bigger exams, otherwise I might go bananas. Neither is it in any pretty girls interest if I have to move to another city to continue studying, I think about other people too.

And now I gotta massage my humongous ballsack.

you got this bro - I believe in you
 

Devious

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As with everything in life there’s an unpleasant flip side of the coin, unfortunately that saying also applies to the life of a university student. When things don’t revolve about sluts, going out with friends, smoking the devils lettuce and talking about primates dicks people struggle with constant stress, existential threat… basically seeing your life falling apart in front of your eyes.


.

Life gets much easier when you are careless by nature to these social bindings, which are just a product of the need to belong. You could still be happy without having to prove to others around you that you're a pimp rock star.

Simplicity and being satisfied with the small things in life is the real happiness.
 
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