Dear Walt,
This is just a quick post to thank you for the memories.
Thank you for the 7-0 victories against Sassoulo. Aside from those matches, I have very few memories of enjoyable matches. That is possibly because I was not watching but your football bored me to tears. There is only so much time a person has and only so much punishment a person can endure.
Thank you for the press conferences. They were more amusing and entertaining than the actual football played by your team. I like how you always focused on everything but your own performance as coach: referring to the rain was one of the highlights of my season thus far. I am also going to miss Mazzarri Bingo and your expressions of despair: bottle biting and holding your head in your hands.
More than anything though, I would like to express my gratitude for your impact and influence on the team in the last 18 months. In particular, the fact that the players have absolutely no idea as to what they are doing, the fact they do not understand tactics, and most importantly, the fact that they are so dispirited and lack anything that resembles a battling and fighting spirit. My favourite games of this season were at home to Cagliari and our recent away match against Parma.
I am sad to see you go but you left us with many great memories.
I wish you every success and happiness for the future.
Regards,
Puma